Saturday, April 24, 2010

Blowjobus Interruptus

For some reason the johns and USASG types don't seem to realize I have eyes in the back of my head (read: even if I'm not around...my friends are, and are happy to report your mongering activities). They seem to think if you scoot down to Cleveland Street, maybe you can get away with getting a beej in public.

Nope.

Reported by a nice guy over in that neck of the woods: number one male in the process of getting a blowjob from a number two female in his green Chevy Tahoe/GMC Yukon, MD tags 32581M3.

April 17th, around 345pm.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Tax Day: Ideas For Frugal Living

What do you do when you've just paid a shit-ton of money to Uncle Sam? You find your inner frugal! Time to say goodbye to those $5 lattes and $200 Craigslist callgirls and be sensible about your spending! You're not Charlie Sheen, so it's Sanka and toothless, Pigtown crackwhores who'll give you an unenthusiastic blowjob for the price of a Starbuck's latte.

Just don't get caught with your jorts around your ankles or Po-Po is gonna take you down to Central Booking.

This guy just learned an important lesson in frugality vs cheapness. Frugality is cutting back on your prostitution activities in order to put aside money for a rainy day. Being cheap is driving around a blighted neighborhood looking for drug addicted females willing to give $10 blowjobs. And then, in lieu of a hotel room, getting serviced in your car on a public street.

At least this guy isn't a certain DC cop who just stopped to give a woman a "ride" and got his gun stolen.

DISTRICT COURT OF MARYLAND
Case Information
Court System:DISTRICT COURT FOR BALTIMORE CITY - CRIMINAL SYSTEM
Case Number:2B02063553Tracking No:106020103453
Case Type:CRIMINAL
District Code:01Location Code:03
Document Type:STATEMENT OF CHARGESIssued Date:04/16/2010
Case Status:ACTIVE

Defendant Information
Defendant Name:BRATTON, GERALD LEE
Race:WHITE, CAUCASIAN, ASIATIC INDIAN, ARAB
Sex:MHeight:601Weight:145DOB:04/06/1953
Address:7124 CUNNING CIRCLE
City:MIDDLE RIVERState:MDZip Code:21220 - 0000

Court Scheduling Information
Trial Date:05/17/2010Trial Time:08:30 AMRoom:3
Trial Type:
Trial Location:1400 E. NORTH AVE BALTIMORE 21213-1400
Charge and Disposition Information
(Each Charge is listed separately. The disposition is listed below the Charge)
Charge No:001Description:PERVERTED PRACTICE
Statute:CR.3.322Description:PERVERTED PRACTICE
Amended Date:CJIS Code:6 3600MO/PLL:Probable Cause:X
Incident Date From:04/15/2010To:04/15/2010Victim Age:


Nice Try, Sweetheart

The other night Jodie wasn't too happy that I broke up her "date" and came between her and a crack hit. She mouthed some unpleasantries that I ignored and I went to bed eventually. She stuck around the block as she seems to only sleep every three days or so. As Rick James famously pointed out, "cocaine is one helluva drug". Since she's a chemically induced insomniac, she had plenty of free time to do the old key the car trick (she's been busted vandalizing other neighborhood organization leader's cars before, and I guess she decided it was my turn, as I had a three foot long key scratch on the truck in the morning). I should be mad, right? Eh, whatever.

The hilarious part: she keyed the panel on my truck that has a dent from plowing snow and some rust, and was due to be painted in a few weeks. That's right, Crackwhoreus Disgustingus, you keyed a panel with a rust spot and a dent that needs bodywork and paint anyway.

Fucking idiot.

PS: remote camera gets setup in the next week or so. I wonder what somebody with her record gets for malicious destruction of property...

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Our Eyes Met, And It Was Magical

No, I'm not relating a tale of urban romance.

Last night Jodie was continuing her "last hooker in Pigtown" act (which explains why the USASG pukes are griping about the lack of selection, believe me...ugh). She was about to have a customer, a fat white guy in a black Chevy Cobalt who was turned around in his seat staring longingly at Jodie, who was eager to please and get her "medicine".

It was then that he noticed me watching him...our eyes met, and for a moment he pondered who I was. After about a second, he realized he was staring into the eyes of the PJW, and he skulked off unsatiated. Poor guy. Guess he made his way back to the wife in the trailer park.

Jodie wasn't too happy about her date being interrupted. Ah well...shit happens, bitch. Especially when you refuse to take your toothless infested crackwhore act somewhere else despite being repeatedly asked to do so by the police and the community at large.

An attempted monger scoop of a prostitute is just as bad as actually doing so, so Sarge K...do your thing. My regards to his wife.

White Male. Black Chevy late model Cobalt (seems to be the monger vehicle of choice...rentals? Nice try boys...it ain't hard for Sarge to get the rental company to give him the name on the credit card)

MD tags KZH 756, attempting to pick up Jodie at 11pm, Bayard and Washington Blvd, 4/14/10.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

White Male, Black Van

Picked up what appears to be almost the Last Hooker Standing, our dear car-vandalizing friend Jodie. Jodie looks like she's been on a seven day bender, slave to the crack pipe. Imagine the mindset that looks at that and says "gee, that's worth twenty bucks". Ugh.

Black van, picking up Jodie on Sunday the 11th around 345pm.
MD tags 22786M1

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Early Bird Gets The Worm (and the gonorrhea, and the chlam, and the festering sores)

Up early this morning (April 8th, at 0530hrs) for a dog walk, and who do we see but our friend Scabface Melanie, feeling her wee hours of the morning crack-jones. Along comes a silver Honda Odyssey with MD tags 605M693 to pick her up on the corner of Washington Blvd and Carey.

Creative folks that they are, they head down to the 1200blk of Bush St, since nobody would ever think to check to see if a public square blowjob would be under way there by the MTA depot where you can occasionally find a lovely collection of used rubbers and needles. Well, nobody, except me. Dude looked pretty surprised to see me walk by the car. A quick scurry of clothes putting back on, and they headed the wrong way down Bush (a one way) and onto Carroll.

Apparently the uhm...task hadn't been completed. How do I know? Because when I hopped into my car and drove down to the 1200blk of Nanticoke, another place nobody would ever think to look for people funding the habits of crackwhores, there they were, still hard at work. A few minutes later it was time for a drive...so just for giggles I followed them down I95 to the Rt100 exit to Rt1 to Amberton Drive...where the Odyssey apparently ended and the post coital cigarette smoking began.

Long drive for the after blow smoke. But that part of the Elkridge business park community is lovely this time of year.

Silver Honda Odyssey
MD Tags
605M693

Slender looking mid 40s white male with a ball cap and a really surprised look. Must not read USASG.

Monday, April 5, 2010

Lady in Yellow...Chevy

Last Weds the 31st of March around 6pm, a yellow Chevy Cobalt or Cavalier dropped Erica Lynn Sears off on Bayard and Ward, where she scored some crack off a drug dealer (a guy who isn't a bad kid, but he's not made much with my efforts to get him a straight job, and has two kids to support at 22...sad) and then hopped back in and sped off.

I guess it wasn't enough to tide her over, as a couple days later during a raid at 845 Carroll she and serial crackwhore Danielle Stevens were arrested with some other junkies during a raid.

Guess our buddy in the yellow Chevy will have to shop elsewhere.

Yellow Chevy, late model, MD tags MKE-451.